Finding a church as a single person can feel uniquely challenging. Many churches are built around families: couples small groups, family worship services, parenting classes, and "bring your spouse" events. If you walk in alone on a Sunday morning, it is easy to feel like the odd one out. But here is the truth: a great church will value you as an individual, not just as half of a future couple. This guide helps you find that church.

The Unique Challenge of Church as a Single Person

Let's be honest about what makes church harder for single people:

Walking in alone. Most church lobbies are full of families and couples. Arriving solo can feel conspicuous and isolating.
Family-centric programming. Many churches organize everything around family units — couples groups, family service projects, parenting classes. Single adults can feel like an afterthought.
The "when are you getting married?" culture. Some church cultures treat singleness as a problem to be solved rather than a valid and valuable life stage.
Limited social connections. In a couple or family, you walk into church with built-in social connections. Single people have to build every connection from scratch.
Age gaps. If you are in your 30s or 40s, you might not fit neatly into the "college ministry" or the "married couples group," leaving you in a programming no-man's land.

These challenges are real, but they are solvable. Plenty of churches do singleness well. You just need to know what to look for.

What to Look for in a Singles-Friendly Church

A theology that values singleness

The Bible presents singleness as a gift, not a deficiency (1 Corinthians 7 is worth reading). Look for a church where the teaching acknowledges and affirms single adults — where sermons occasionally address non-married life, where illustrations are not always about marriage and family, and where singleness is treated as a complete and valuable life stage.

A young adult community (not just a singles group)

A dedicated "singles group" can feel like a dating service or a holding pen. Better is a young adult community (20s-30s) that includes both single and married people. This creates natural, organic community without making your relationship status the defining feature of your church experience.

That said, some singles-specific events and groups can be valuable — particularly ones focused on community, service, and spiritual growth rather than matchmaking.

Mixed-age small groups

Small groups that include a mix of single and married people, and a range of ages, provide richer community than groups organized solely by relationship status. You can learn from married people, and they can learn from you. Intergenerational community is one of the unique gifts of church life.

Multiple service times and flexible scheduling

Single adults often have less predictable schedules. A church with multiple service times (including Saturday evening) and flexible small group options accommodates this reality better than a church with one Sunday morning service and nothing else.

Strong serving culture

Serving on a team is especially important for single churchgoers because it provides a natural context for building friendships without the social pressure of a "hangout." When you set up chairs with someone every Sunday, you build a bond that goes deeper than small talk after a service. Read more in our guide on getting involved at a new church.

Social events that are not couple-centric

Look for a church that hosts events accessible to single people: game nights, hiking groups, volunteer days, dinner clubs, trivia nights. These are more welcoming than "couples date night" or "family fun day" events.

Red Flags for Single Churchgoers

Every illustration and application is about marriage. If the pastor can only apply Scripture to married life, the teaching is incomplete.
Pressure to date within the church. A healthy church creates community, not a dating pool. If people are constantly trying to set you up, the culture may be unhealthy.
No programming for anyone between college and married-with-kids. If the church goes straight from "college ministry" to "young marrieds," single adults in their late 20s through 40s are invisible.
A culture that treats single adults as less mature or less committed. If only married people are in leadership or only married men are considered for elder roles regardless of gifting, the church has a problematic view of singleness.
No single adults visibly involved. If you look around and see only families, that tells you something about the church's culture and programming.

Practical Tips for the Single Church Searcher

Use FaithScout to filter. Search for churches that have active young adult ministries and read visitor reviews specifically from single attendees.
Take the matching quiz. FaithScout's quiz considers your life stage as part of the matching process.
Visit on your own terms. You do not need a buddy to visit a church. Walking in alone gets easier each time, and most churches are very welcoming to solo visitors. See our first visit guide for what to expect.
Ask specific questions. When you visit, ask: "What do you offer for single adults?" and "What does your small group structure look like for people who are not married?" The answers (or lack thereof) will tell you a lot.
Look for a church near your home or work. As a single person, proximity matters even more than for families. Being close means you can easily attend midweek events, meet people for coffee, and stay connected without logistics being a barrier.
Attend a mid-size church. Very large churches can feel isolating for single people (you are anonymous in a crowd), while very small churches may have few people in your age range. Mid-size churches (200-600) often hit the sweet spot of having enough people in your life stage while being small enough that you are known.
Be patient but set a timeline. Finding your church will take longer as a single person simply because you are navigating it alone. Give yourself 6-8 weeks (see our guide on how long to church shop), but do not let the search drag on indefinitely.

Building Community as a Single Person

Once you have found your church, building community requires extra intentionality when you are single:

Host something. Invite people from your small group or serving team to your place for dinner, a game night, or a watch party. Being the host puts you in a natural relational role.
Build mixed-status friendships. Do not limit yourself to only hanging out with other single people. Friendships with married couples, families, and older adults enrich your life and theirs.
Join a serving team where you interact. Greeting, hospitality, and children's ministry teams involve more interpersonal interaction than behind-the-scenes roles.
Say yes aggressively. Every invitation to coffee, lunch, game night, or an event — say yes for the first three months. You can start being selective later. Early on, volume matters.
Be vulnerable. Share your life in small group. Ask for prayer. Admit when things are hard. Vulnerability is the doorway to deep friendship, and it works just as well for single people as for anyone else.

Frequently Asked Questions

Is church worth it if you are single?

Absolutely. Church provides community, spiritual growth, purpose, and genuine friendships that are especially valuable when you do not have a spouse or family at home. Many single adults say their church community is their primary social network and support system.

Should I join a singles group at church?

It depends on the group's culture. A singles group focused on community, service, and spiritual growth can be wonderful. A singles group that feels like a dating service or a pity party is not helpful. Visit once, evaluate the culture, and decide. Mixed-age, mixed-status groups often provide richer community.

How do I avoid feeling lonely at church as a single person?

Get involved beyond Sundays: join a small group, serve on a team, attend events, and be intentional about building friendships. The loneliest people at church are those who only attend Sunday services. Involvement is the antidote to isolation, whether you are single or married.

Should I go to church to find a spouse?

Go to church for community, growth, and worship — not primarily to find a spouse. That said, church is one of the best places to meet someone who shares your values and faith. Many marriages do start at church. But making spouse-finding your primary motivation will lead to disappointment and poor church choices.

What size church is best for single adults?

Mid-size churches (200-600 weekly attendance) often work best for single adults. They are large enough to have people in your age range and life stage, but small enough that you can be known by name and build genuine relationships. Very large churches can feel anonymous, while very small churches may have few peers.

Find Your Church

Being single at church is not a disadvantage — it is a different path to community, and it can be a deeply rewarding one. The right church will see you as a whole person, not half of a missing couple. It will challenge you, support you, and welcome you into genuine belonging.

Take the FaithScout quiz to find churches that match your preferences and life stage, or browse churches near you. Your community is out there.